I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should
walk with me than merely tell the way. -Edgar Guest, poet (20 Aug
1881-1959)
Andrew: A Remembrance and Tribute
I first met Andrew in the Fall of 1967 in the cafeteria at
United College. I had seen him around campus, on and off, the year before, but
never really made his acquaintance. That September, an older student, Peter
Press, a Winnipeg high school teacher, on sabbatical, working on his Master’s, was
coaching a rugby squad and I decided I’d like to try playing the sport. Andrew
chummed around with a number of students that I knew from the handball courts
so when I asked them if they might be interested in playing rugby Andrew said
he was keen to join. The sport was very new to Winnipeg, at the time, and
although we were all inexperienced, Peter was a terrific coach and he fashioned
us into a pretty good squad that held its own against a number of other, better,
local teams, mainly ex-pats from various Commonwealth countries.
Andrew, in particular, was a very good athlete and could run
like the wind. Tough as well, he was never afraid to tackle or be tackled.
However, he was always a terrific sportsman, never a mean or underhanded
opponent. We all played for the thrill of the game, the rough and tumble of the
scrum and the rush of adrenaline when we scored a try. Win or lose, we were all
smiles as we congratulated our opponents after the game was over. I can still
see the huge grin on Andrew’s face as we relived the highlights in the bar
afterwards.
At this point, Andrew was a part-time student as he was
working full-time. This meant that our class schedules were quite different so
most of my contact with him was either at rugby practice or the games
themselves, and, perhaps, more importantly, at the wonderful parties that
fellow students hosted. Many were the Saturday nights that we danced all night
to The Doors and The Stones and Donovan, yes, Donovan! These were wonderful,
golden times and over the course of this year we became very, very good
friends.
The following year my course load was too heavy for me to
play, even if I had made the squad, and so I didn’t see quite as much of
Andrew. Nevertheless, we still kept in touch and continued to socialize. A few
years and a few girlfriends later, I moved to Vancouver in 1974 but distance
meant nothing to Andrew. In 1976 he flew to the coast and took Corinne, my wife
by then, to the Dylan concert. By this time I was a father so I stayed at home,
parenting Ayn and Chloë, while the real “kids” had a blast!
And then, except for a few phone calls and a number of short
visits when we were back in Winnipeg for Christmas, from time to time, I lost complete
touch with Andrew. I had occasional, sporadic bits of news from a number of
other mutual university friends of “Andrew sightings” but nobody really knew
where he was or what he was doing. In fact, it wasn’t until 2005 or perhaps
2006 that, out of the blue, I had a call from Andrew! Of course I was simply
delighted to reconnect and to know that he was the extremely proud father of
two children, Alexander and Tessa.
From then on we were in regular telephone contact and over
the course of our long distance talks we filled in many of the missing years,
on both sides. In May of 2007 I drove across the country, from Vancouver to St
John’s, with a close friend. On the way back I stopped in Toronto and Andrew
and I met, face-to-face, after almost thirty years! Of course we had changed.
We were older and greyer, for a start, but our friendship hadn’t waned. Many of
the intervening years hadn’t been kind to Andrew but he was still the same
person I’d met back in Winnipeg when were as young and green as the rugby
playing field we welded our friendship upon. His joy and his happiness were not
in material possessions but in the sunrises he’d watch, in all seasons, over
Lake Ontario, at the foot of Woodbine, on the beach; in the flowers and plants
he tended with loving care, on his balcony, in the various dishes he’d make,
always careful to buy “bargain” ingredients; in the friendships, old and new,
he treasured; and above all, in his two children.
Being a parent is never easy and being a father certainly held
frustrations for Andrew. It would be untrue to argue otherwise but this is
beside the point. I knew how much he loved both his children and how much he
wanted for them. Whenever we spoke they were always subjects of pride. Naturally,
any missteps pained him but he knew they would find their own way in their own
time.
Being a friend, a true friend, is never easy either. If
Andrew can be said to have had a flaw it is perhaps that he always though the
best of everyone he met. Unfortunately, this wonderful openness sometimes allowed
unscrupulous individuals to take advantage of his generosity. And yet he never became
embittered, nor complained, to me at least, by or about such incidents. He felt
that he lived his life according to how he believed it should be led and was
not prepared to compromise this approach even if it meant that he might be
taken advantage of. So be it, he argued. While I felt that this naiveté
should probably
be tempered, in certain cases he told me about, he often agreed, over the phone,
but in fact, to my knowledge, he never changed his approach.
A too, too
generous individual, a fiercely loyal friend, a loving, proud, proud father,
Andrew was a truly remarkable person. His demons were many, obviously. But I
will not remember him for his struggle with these cruel antagonists. Rather, I
will remember his infectious smile; his refusal not to laugh at everything,
especially himself; his delight in so many of the things we simply take for
granted: a brief conversation with a fellow bus passenger; a simple,
home-prepared meal; a drop of malt at a local pub; a memory from the past or a
dream of the future. Goodbye Andrew, my wonderful, wonderful friend. I trust
you are at peace. Know that all of us who knew you are far better for having
known you. Thank you for your gentle kindness and concern. Thank you for your
love and affection. Thank you for always sharing your exuberance, your liveliness, your effervescence, your incredible zest for life. Much, much love,
Patrick.
Hi Sarge! Thanks for invitation! Cora Lee had chatted with Flamin' last night, while I was out riding so I gather we are coming down for Friday night. Looking forward to it. Thanks very much. I'm not allowed in our new, used car so I have to cycle to Osoyoos. Looking forward to that ride as well as I've not gone that far south before.
We enjoyed a great time with Ayn, Winston and Chloë over their stay. On Tuesday, Chloë's 39th, we had a wonderful lunch at Poplar Grove. Ayn prepared tasty Mexican that evening as the girls wanted to stay in night before they drove back to Vancouver.
Hello Patrick and Corinne it was lovely to see you in your new home, it is quite a lovely little place lots of potentials and with your talent to make things beautiful and different it will be a beaut.
Lore and i had a marvellous time with our friends in Oliver, the fire luckily was far away from them. We meandered to Salmon Arm had a great stay at the Comfort Inn and explored the little city. One night we had terrific frightening thunderstorm. I found if beautiful but Hoffmann was scared to death. it cleared the air.
Clinton was beautiful I love that little forlorn place. We stayed at the Lodge which has gorgeous rooms. I have a friend there a COWBOY and he has done many other work in his live. written 6 books,well it is another story how I met him. It makes it easier when you know some body in a place you like to explore.
For me the history of Clinton the gold rush the cattle and ranch life, Chris knows a lot about. As he has-been a cowboy at the famous GANG RANCH and the EMPIRE VALLEY RANCH. It is fascinating. The romance of the life of a cowboy goes out of the window. it is a very hard life in the days around when Chris
was cowpoking 1962-
On our return to the city it showed itself from a very ugly side. It took us 4 hours to get home from WV to Kitsilano. A gigantic traffic jam due to an accident on Lions and the Second narrow. It stinks....You lucky you live a smaller and beautiful place. take care and keep in touch always Gisela
Up at 6:30 am to have a mug of delish Instanto. Filled my camel-pack for the day's hike near Apex. After a tasty breakfast of overleft kartofellage Mme Coriandre dropped me off at the meeting spot, parking lot at Home Hardware here in town, at 8:00 am. I introduced her to a number of the group before she took off to drop Equinox at Huber Bannister for the undercoating package. I car-pooled with Moira, from Naramata, along with Marie and Jacqueline, Marie's friend from Delaware. Marie had originally come to pick fruit at Moira's orchard and become close friends. She now lives with Moira and her family and is starting work at a mental health clinic next week.
We drove up Green Mountain Road towards Apex, (Route I had cycled this past Sunday.), and then took the turnoff to Apex itself. Continued on up the mountain for approximately 8 km where we then followed a pretty rough, steep logging road. Over a small bridge and then Moira shifted her pick-up into 4-wheel drive for another two or three km, over an even rougher, steeper surface, rocking and rolling all the way to a small clearing where the four vehicles parked. Our destination was Sheep Rock, a peak in the Brent Mountain Protected Area, to the north of Apex itself.
We left the clearing close to 9:00 am and the 17 of us made our way through a re-planted patch of hillside until we reached a more established hiking/mountain biking trail. Going was much easier here as the undergrowth/brush was not as dense. Still one had to be careful of sharp, dead, pointed branches and live, boughs that would spring back into one's face in the wake of the hiker ahead. Overall, the forest and surrounding scenery was lovely, cool and comfortable whenever the sun was obscured. A few fits and starts as our fearless leaders tried to find the easiest route to Sheep Rock. As a newcomer I simply waited to see which direction we would take. After the first confab a splinter group of three headed off and we were not reunited until about three hours later. We were in contact, however, via cell. Took us a bit of bushwhacking, after a very pleasant lunch break of 15 minutes or so, near a dry creek bed, to find the established trail which would eventually lead us to a series of picturesque alpine meadows, about an hour and a half from Sheep Rock.
An hour from the top we met our renegade hikers. They had already been to the top so Marie and Jacqueline stayed in the top meadow, in the shade, (My friend Jake did the same as he'd been before.), while Ken accompanied the rest of us. At this point I was one of the slowest so together with Jim, Anthea and Bill I made my way onward and upward. Anthea took a "wrong" turn a some point so we actually took a longer path to the top. Still, quite easy going for most of the ascent, so didn't make much difference. However, rest had come and gone by the time we reached the top. Spent a few minutes enjoying the phenomenal panorama, Jim pointing out the various peaks we could see from our 360º perch.
[Chloe Alexis Dunn Off to America!!! See you soon Jennifer Gold and Howard Gold!!! Ayn P Thanks for the ride to Bellingham dear Sister xoxo!]
Started back down after four hours of pretty much uphill slogging. Descent was not as steep, in most places, as last Monday's hike and with my new Hi-Tec hiking boots my feet were fine, although quite weary by this time. While I was never in any serious discomfort I must admit that the last three hours required much mind over matter as I knew we had a long, long way to go before being back at the clearing and vehicles. Olga and Jake and Anthea were very kind, along with Tia, Anthea's gorgeous lab, in keeping me company whenever I was the last one in line. By the final hour most of the rest of gang were as weary as I was. Everyone agreed that this was the longest hike, in terms of time, that group had ever undertaken, so I felt pretty good about having completed it. Reached the clearing, after a bit more bushwhacking when our fearless leaders, Arturo and Guillermo, at this point, had a bit of difficulty knowing where to leave established trail for re-planted area.
Back to the vehicles after eight hours and 15 km! Happy to be there! Thanked one another for grand outing and I hopped into Moira's truck and we made our way back to Penticton. Invited her and the girls in for a drink but it was almost 6:30 pm by then and they had to be home for dinner. Thanked them for terrific outing and waved goodbye. Found Marcus Aurelius and Lady Mary sipping cool drinks under the pergola!
Stats for hike:
https://connect.garmin.com/modern/activity/872279055#.VdaLQIDHIm0.email
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